Penguin Random House Canada has a job opening. It’s for the position of fiction editor (Penguin). Your tasks and responsibilities will include, but not be limited to, the following:
You must read books.
You must enjoy discussing books.
You must be talented at all things bookish.
You must be a bookie at heart.
You must love penguins, especially the emperor variety.
Click here to learn more about the real job and how to apply. Deadline is April 29, 2016. For my own part, I hereby dedicate this short story to the person who fills this position.