In the raging-like-a-bad-case-of-herpes shitstorm that is the hallmark of politics in Washington D.C. right now, it’s comforting to know that the former president has it all figured out: Don’t give a flying **** what the hell is happening out there in the world; undo the top button on your dress shirt; make time to see JT when up in the Great White North; hang with Sir Dick Branson when you feel like it’s “better to be a Virgin member”; and wear cool shades at all times, even at night when you’re secretly pretending to be Corey Hart.
But there’s actually more to looking 50+ Fab if you’re Barack Obama: There are telomeres at play. A lot of telomeres. I’ll let Drake Baer (@drake_baer) explain this in more detail through his post “A Scientific Explanation For Why Barack Obama Looks So Damn Good,” but needless to say President Obama wasn’t just in your class 20 years ago – he was your teacher! (Shout-out to Oil of Olay and the faux Maverick and Charlie on this one.)
All jokes aside, it’s comforting to know that the previous Commander-in-Chief not only has his sanity in tact after eight tough years in office, but that he is enjoying his newfound “retirement” – and looking pretty damn good doing it.
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Richard H. Harris 